Entries tagged with “peaceful joy”.


Whether I’m speaking to a client or another professional who works with fertility, I’m always talking about the Mind~Body principle: How you feel matters to your fertility.

But what does this really mean? Does it mean you have to be positive about your fertility all the time? Well, yes and no.

Let me explain.

Your cells are constantly listening to the emotions within you in order to know how to respond. Your brain doesn’t know the difference between something you are experiencing in real time or simply thinking about it. Your emotions and thoughts — whether related to fertility or other areas of your life — impact your reproductive system.

My most pressing desire in my work with my clients is to start with simply feeling good in the moment; feeling peace, calm, even joy if we can get there. If we can get there by talking specifically about fertility, great, but if it means simply feeling good in general, that’s just as good.

Let me give you an example. I’d like to share an e-mail from a woman who participated in last week’s Mind, Body, Sprit Tools to Release Fear and Worry teleclass because I believe it reflects this exact point.

Jennifer,

I am in the process of preparing for a frozen embryo transfer. I have had many ups and downs in this fertility journey. Obviously I don’t know yet if the “dealing with fear and worry” workshop will “result as such” in a pregnancy but I can say I feel much better, much calmer, and generally okay. This in and of itself is a positive result. This process has been so fraught with unsettling emotions, the ability to feel good while going through a procedure is a new and positive development.

Thanks for a thoughtful workshop,

K.

PS: I used the “support from mother earth, love from spirit above” tool a few times yesterday having nothing to do with fertility.

Two aspects of this e-mail stood out to me. First, she celebrated feeling better — without knowing if it was going to have a specific effect on getting pregnant. While I know the ultimate desire is to be pregnant, you must give your body time to shift. Feeling good is the evidence you have that you are putting your body in its best condition to conceive.

Second, she used the tools we spoke about for emotions having nothing to do with fertility. A Mind~Body approach to fertility is a holistic approach. Your body is listening to all of your emotions, all of the time, not just the ones about fertility.

At the energetic level, creating what you want is about emotion. Your emotion is a manifestation and it is your signal that what you want is on its way.

At the physical level, feeling better is supportive of your body in general and your fertility specifically.

Of course, with all the ups and downs of infertility (not to mention the rest of life), feeling good requires a PhD in emotional shifting. Use whatever you can to shift how you are feeling in the moment.

Meditation, EFT, visualization, exercise, getting outside, reading a great book, listening to beautiful music — these are but a few of the tools you can use to create a shift.

Back to the original question: do you have to feel positive about your fertility all the time? Here’s where I suggest you start: put fertility to the side and simply concentrate on asking yourself the question: How do I feel right now? What can I be/do in this moment to feel even just a little bit better?

Jennifer Bloome is a Fertility Expert helping women energetically balance and heal their mind, body, and spirit to boost natural fertility. Jennifer is the creator of the internationally recognized Journey of the Heart series of guided meditations to support women in all stages of fertility treatment and pregnancy. For 3 no-charge guided meditations as well as information on teleclasses or individual sessions, please visit http://www.anjionline.com.

Question: “I have listened to relaxation/mindfulness CDs. I find the effects are not long lasting. Stress is alleviated for a short while, but returns rather quickly. What am I missing?”

Answer: Great question! It takes time to use the relaxation CDs, if they aren’t helpful long term, what’s the point of scheduling in the time? There are several points that I would like to share:

First: when you include relaxation or mindfulness CDs into your regular routine, you are making changes in how your body handles stress at the cellular level. It is as if you are putting a layer of Saran Wrap over the tops of the cells that listen for stress signals in your body.

This means when situations arise in your life that would typically cause you to feel stress in your body, the cells won’t react and therefore you won’t feel as anxious, tense, sore, headache-y, or with your specific stress signal.

Here’s the catch though. In order to get these lasting physiological effects, you need to be using the relaxation technique on a regular basis for about two weeks.

You will feel that short-term relief immediately upon listening — the deeper effects take longer.

Second: Stress is a catchall phrase for many different emotions: anger, frustration, sadness, fear, grief, hopelessness. These emotions are present in daily life for many reasons. Simply doing a relaxation exercise everyday isn’t going to change those reasons.

A relaxation exercise doesn’t change that you have been trying for a baby for two years, or that you are worried about your finances, or that you are still grieving over your last miscarriage.

It will change the intensity of the emotions, but the thoughts and beliefs that create the emotions will still be firmly entrenched.

In my opinion, the relaxation CD is simply the first step of feeling better. This is a very important step because it helps to quiet the body, which makes it a lot easier to hear what is really causing the emotion.

The second step is identifying and releasing the thoughts and beliefs, which are creating the stressful thoughts in the first place. EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) is an invaluable tool for creating changes in your thoughts and beliefs.

So, when you combine the regularity of a relaxation CD with releasing the thoughts and beliefs that cause stressful feelings, you end with a powerful combination that can change your day to day life experience as well as enhance your natural fertility.

Jennifer Bloome is a Fertility Expert helping women energetically balance and heal their mind, body, and spirit to boost natural fertility. Jennifer is the creator of the internationally recognized Journey of the Heart series of guided meditations to support women in all stages of fertility treatment and pregnancy. For 3 no-charge guided meditations as well as information on teleclasses or individual sessions, please visit www.AnjiOnline.com.

“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves”
— Victor Frankel

It is simply human nature to try our “known” solutions before doing something else. It’s not that we only want an easy solution; it’s more about: how can you try something you don’t know about?

And yet, when a big problem persists, it’s time to find out what you didn’t know you didn’t know.

Mind~Body~Spirit solutions for fertility issues typically fall into the “didn’t know you didn’t know” category. Taking on a M~B~S view of fertility requires moving from believing that doctors and medical science have ALL the answers to uncovering your own role in your health.

You have probably made steps to taking care of your own health in the areas of diet and exercise before. However, what about listening to the deeper messages from your body?

Here’s something to think about: In addition to being painful, excruciatingly frustrating, depressing, sad and (add your current emotion here), infertility is also a message to you from your body.

A message that energy is blocked somewhere in your body. A message that your body is trying to get your attention in the only way it knows how. A message that when you really hear it; will tell you what to do to heal.

Christiane Northrup, M.D. in Women’s Bodies, Women’s Wisdom puts this very eloquently: “Every thought we think has a biochemical equivalent. Every emotion we feel has a biochemical equivalent. One of my colleagues says, ‘The mind is the space between the cells.’ So when the part of your mind that is your uterus talks to you, through pain or excessive bleeding, are you prepared to listen to it?”

This can be quite a challenge to get your mind wrapped around. We typically aren’t taught to listen to our bodies. We’re taught to cover up symptoms with Tylenol or Tums. We’re taught to push through our body’s pain. Not with malicious intent — but from a disconnected understanding of how the body works.

I invite you to begin to step up to this new challenge to change yourself. Begin to start thinking of all of the physical symptoms in your body — painful periods, short luteal phases, muscle pain, headaches, and digestive issues — as messages from your body.

You’ll be amazed at what you hear once you start listening.

Jennifer Bloome is a Fertility Expert helping women energetically balance and heal their mind, body, and spirit to boost natural fertility. Jennifer is the creator of the internationally recognized Journey of the Heart series of guided meditations to support women in all stages of fertility treatment and pregnancy. For 3 no-charge guided meditations as well as information on teleclasses or individual sessions, please visit www.AnjiOnline.com.

In the business world, days are structured with meetings, projects, and deadlines. Without structure, days would be chaotic and unproductive.

The same is true for your emotions and feelings.

When you don’t consider how you would like to feel, your emotions and feelings can be chaotic and lead you to many unproductive places. Paying attention to your feelings and emotions is important to your reproductive system.

While no one can be positive 100% or probably even 80% of the time, particularly when dealing with a challenging situation like fertility issues, knowing how to bring your emotions back to a neutral or positive place makes a positive impact on your fertility.

When you are consistently feeling stressed, upset, angry, frustrated, you are triggering the fight or flight stress response in your body, which wrecks havoc with your entire reproductive system.

One way to help shift your thoughts and feelings is to create a strong framework by setting an intention about how you want to feel before launching into the day.

For example, when you get up in the morning, as you are getting ready for the day, decide how you would like to feel today — peaceful, joyful, calm, accepting, curious, centered, exuberant, etc. Once you have decided what you would like to have as your primary emotion today, set your intention that your day will be filled with this emotion.

As you practice this on a regular basis, you will be surprised by how your days begin to follow your intentions.

Jennifer Bloome is a Fertility Expert helping women energetically balance and heal their mind, body, and spirit to boost natural fertility. Jennifer is the creator of the internationally recognized Journey of the Heart series of guided meditations to support women in all stages of fertility treatment and pregnancy. For 3 no-charge guided meditations as well as information on teleclasses or individual sessions, please visit www.AnjiOnline.com.

“Resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.” —Carrie Fisher

There are always going to be people who trigger feelings of anger and resentment within you. It’s not that you have the initial feelings, but what you do with those feelings that will affect your ongoing physical and emotional health. Learning to be able to experience the feelings and then let them go as opposed to holding onto them and revisiting them over and over is a powerful lesson.

If you are having a hard time letting go, a good question to ask yourself is “why does this bother ME so much.” Yes, perhaps that person’s actions are truly reprehensible. However, what specifically causes a problem for you?

Is it that you would really want their situation for yourself?
Does it go against one of your core values?
Does it highlight how unfair your own life feels?

Once you can see what it is triggering in you, then you can focus your efforts on your own issue. It is 100 times easier to deal with your own issue than someone else’s behavior. Does it make the situation any better? Is it condoning that person’s behavior? No. However, the goal is to keep other’s actions from affecting your own emotional or physical health.

Jennifer Bloome is a Fertility Expert helping women energetically balance and heal their mind, body, and spirit to boost natural fertility. Jennifer is the creator of the internationally recognized Journey of the Heart series of guided meditations to support women in all stages of fertility treatment and pregnancy. For 3 no-charge guided meditations as well as information on teleclasses or individual sessions, please visit www.AnjiOnline.com.

Question:

clock_south_hampton2How do you maintain a positive attitude while in the waiting period after embryo transfer (for IVF cycle) and preparing yourself emotionally for a possible failure? After several failed cycles, it is too painful to not try to prepare oneself for a negative outcome. It’s too painful to believe with all your heart that you are pregnant and then receive a call that you are not. I do use your IVF Meditation CD and love it, but it gets harder the last few days to get into that zone of peace your meditation CD usually brings.

Answer:

Here’s the question I ask my individual clients who have been through the ringer over and over again:

Where can you put your best focus?

Chances are, if you are someone who has been through believing and then getting negative results, focusing on “I’m pregnant” is going to be really hard.

How about a focus of:

I’ve done the best I know how to do.
I’m allowing my body to do the best it/she can do in this moment.
I do what I can do and leave the rest to Spirit/God/Universe.
No matter what happens, I’ll find a way to be a Mother.
I’m open to receiving the best outcome for this cycle.

See if there’s one of these that speaks to you — or if it inspires a thought of your own.

Your body knows your desire is to get pregnant and have a healthy baby at the end of nine months. Your job — from a Mind~Body perspective — is to find a way to have thoughts that match this desire.

Focusing on “I’m Pregnant” when you’ve had a lot of experience to prove it isn’t a certainty you are, now puts your thoughts in direct conflict with your desire. You find yourself resisting the thoughts you are thinking and not being able to get into the flow that was easier to find during the first part of your cycle.

You want to pick a thought that leaves you feeling open and connected with your body — not fighting it.

No matter where you are in your cycle right now, begin to think about what your best focus can be.

Jennifer Bloome is a Fertility Expert helping women energetically balance and heal their mind, body, and spirit to boost natural fertility. Jennifer is the creator of the internationally recognized Journey of the Heart series of guided meditations to support women in all stages of fertility treatment and pregnancy. For 3 no-charge guided meditations as well as information on teleclasses or individual sessions, please visit www.AnjiOnline.com.

“True silence is the rest of the mind; it is to the spirit what sleep is to the body, nourishment and refreshment.”
—William Penn

Many of us fear silence. If we just keep pushing ahead, doing and constantly thinking, we can keep pushing away all the thoughts that scare and frighten us. What if this never changes? What if I never achieve what I am pursuing so hard? Why is life so unfair?

But constantly pushing and driving and ignoring those very thoughts isn’t sustainable. There is a breaking point — whether that breaking point shows up as depression, anxiety, or extreme fatigue.

When you add in a short time of relaxation and silence to your regular routine, you take the “edge” off those fearful thoughts. They no longer hold the power they used to. You improve your general physical and emotional health as well as your reproductive system.

Today, take five minutes to stop pushing forward and just be. Focus on your breath coming in and out of your body. Let any thoughts going through your mind gently float away like watching leaves going down a stream. If you have trouble completely emptying your mind, pick a word or phrase to focus on, “I am feeling peaceful,” “joy,” “quiet.” As you get more adept at finding the silence, lengthen out the time you spend in quiet. Notice how you feel as you allow yourself this gift everyday.

Jennifer Bloome is a Fertility Expert helping women energetically balance and heal their mind, body, and spirit to boost natural fertility. Jennifer is the creator of the internationally recognized Journey of the Heart series of guided meditations to support women in all stages of fertility treatment and pregnancy. For 3 no-charge guided meditations as well as information on teleclasses or individual sessions, please visit www.AnjiOnline.com.