Anji Blog

Emotions. Dealing with fertility issues creates so many emotions.

These emotions can wreck havoc with your desire to stay focused on what you want. Sometimes you know exactly why you’re feeling how you’re feeling; other times, emotions can just feel like a knot or a block, and you don’t know why you’re feeling that way.

At times like these, I like to use a breathing technique.

You can use your breath to help clear away your thoughts, or interrupt a downward spiral of emotion. Breathing techniques are wonderful because you can use them anytime, anywhere.

Try these breathing patterns to help you let go of whatever you are feeling and create the space you need to start on a different feeling path.

1. Breathe in for a count of (4), hold your breath for a count of (8), and then blow out for a count of (7).
2. Breathe in for a count of (4), hold your breath for a count of (16), and blow out for a count of (8).

Choose one of the patterns and do each cycle (3) times. As you are holding your breath, imagine your breath is reaching in and grabbing onto whatever you don’t want in your mind or your body, then you can blow it all away on your out breath.

How do you feel when you are finished?

Jennifer Bloome is a Fertility Expert helping women energetically balance and heal their mind, body, and spirit to boost natural fertility. Jennifer is the creator of the internationally recognized Journey of the Heart series of guided meditations to support women in all stages of fertility treatment and pregnancy. For 3 no-charge guided meditations as well as information on teleclasses or individual sessions, please visit www.AnjiOnline.com.

I think that letting go is something that happens in waves, or in maybe layers is a better word. We have so many hopes, dreams, and emotions wrapped up in each part of us that we want to release, it almost has to happen in stages. Give yourself permission to let go of whatever piece you can today and know that tomorrow a little bit more will go and the next day a bit more…

Imagery for letting go in stages:

Imagine your mind and body is wrapped around whatever you wish to release as tightly as a new bud on a rose bush. This bud is completely wrapped with the green outer petals still tightly furled. It is so tightly furled that the true shape of the bud is still distorted. What would happen if those first leaves never released? What if the flower yet to be just stayed tightly curled around its core? How much energy is it taking just to be trying to hold so tightly to this position? Imagine your mind and body is slowly deciding to loosen, just a bit. Perhaps, even loosening seems scary, so they decide just not to hold on so hard, so the first decision is to release the muscles that are working so hard to hang on. Then, when you are ready, imagine that your mind and body are slowing unfurling from this issue, gently opening and releasing, and opening and releasing, slowly showing more and more of what’s inside, exposing the color, shape, and beauty of the flower within. Gently, and at your own pace, opening to new possibilities.

Jennifer Bloome is a Fertility Expert helping women energetically balance and heal their mind, body, and spirit to boost natural fertility. Jennifer is the creator of the internationally recognized Journey of the Heart series of guided meditations to support women in all stages of fertility treatment and pregnancy. For 3 no-charge guided meditations as well as information on teleclasses or individual sessions, please visit www.AnjiOnline.com.

As humans, we crave meaning. We need to know WHY something is happening. Perhaps it’s the thought that if we know the “why,” we’ll know the “how” to solve the issue that fuels the search.

Sometimes, though, the unresolved search for meaning leads to considerable stress and leads us to ask questions that are even more difficult to answer. Because they are difficult to answer, we often “make up” our own meanings that come more from our wounded self than from Truth.

A question that often comes up when I speak to clients is: “Is it possible that I’m just not supposed to have children? Maybe God doesn’t want me to have children?” Sometimes clients have already decided they are being punished by God. Or simply, children aren’t part of their life purpose.

If this is something you have been thinking about, here’s my suggestion.

When you are dealing with an issue as charged as infertility or loss, it is easy for the hurt part of your mind to give you an answer that isn’t true.

To get a true answer, schedule a time when you can go somewhere very quiet and a place that you feel most connected with your higher power. Spend several minutes just breathing. Allow yourself to come into this present moment. Then, in whatever way feels most comfortable and authentic, connect with your higher power.

When you feel the connection, ask the question: are children part of my life path?

Notice the impulses and intuition that you receive.

Connecting and asking the question from a quiet and centered space is the only way to get a clear answer. This allows you to get an answer that is not from your conscious mind or the part of you that has been hurt over and over.

No matter what your question, this process will help you receive answers; and you will stay out of the negative downward stress spiral that comes when the hurt part of you is trying desperately to answer the question.

Jennifer Bloome is a Fertility Expert helping women energetically balance and heal their mind, body, and spirit to boost natural fertility. Jennifer is the creator of the internationally recognized Journey of the Heart series of guided meditations to support women in all stages of fertility treatment and pregnancy. For 3 no-charge guided meditations as well as information on teleclasses or individual sessions, please visit www.AnjiOnline.com.

Question:

How do you maintain a positive attitude while in the waiting period after embryo transfer (for IVF cycle) and preparing yourself emotionally for a possible failure? After several failed cycles, it is too painful to not try to prepare oneself for a negative outcome. It’s too painful to believe with all your heart that you are pregnant and then receive a call that you are not. I do use your IVF Meditation CD and love it, but it gets harder the last few days to get into that zone of peace your meditation CD usually brings.

Answer:

Here’s the question I ask my individual clients who have been through the ringer over and over again:

Where can you put your best focus?

Chances are, if you are someone who has been through believing and then getting negative results, focusing on “I’m pregnant” is going to be really hard.

How about a focus of:

I’ve done the best I know how to do.
I’m allowing my body to do the best it/she can do in this moment.
I do what I can do and leave the rest to Spirit/God/Universe.
No matter what happens, I’ll find a way to be a Mother.
I’m open to receiving the best outcome for this cycle.

See if there’s one of these that speaks to you — or if it inspires a thought of your own.

Your body knows your desire is to get pregnant and have a healthy baby at the end of nine months. Your job — from a Mind~Body perspective — is to find a way to have thoughts that match this desire.

Focusing on “I’m Pregnant” when you’ve had a lot of experience to prove it isn’t a certainty you are, now puts your thoughts in direct conflict with your desire. You find yourself resisting the thoughts you are thinking and not being able to get into the flow that was easier to find during the first part of your cycle.

You want to pick a thought that leaves you feeling open and connected with your body — not fighting it.

No matter where you are in your cycle right now, begin to think about what your best focus can be.

Jennifer Bloome is a Fertility Expert helping women energetically balance and heal their mind, body, and spirit to boost natural fertility. Jennifer is the creator of the internationally recognized Journey of the Heart series of guided meditations to support women in all stages of fertility treatment and pregnancy. For 3 no-charge guided meditations as well as information on teleclasses or individual sessions, please visit www.AnjiOnline.com.

“True silence is the rest of the mind; it is to the spirit what sleep is to the body, nourishment and refreshment.”
—William Penn

Many of us fear silence. If we just keep pushing ahead, doing and constantly thinking, we can keep pushing away all the thoughts that scare and frighten us. What if this never changes? What if I never achieve what I am pursuing so hard? Why is life so unfair?

But constantly pushing and driving and ignoring those very thoughts isn’t sustainable. There is a breaking point — whether that breaking point shows up as depression, anxiety, or extreme fatigue.

When you add in a short time of relaxation and silence to your regular routine, you take the “edge” off those fearful thoughts. They no longer hold the power they used to. You improve your general physical and emotional health as well as your reproductive system.

Today, take five minutes to stop pushing forward and just be. Focus on your breath coming in and out of your body. Let any thoughts going through your mind gently float away like watching leaves going down a stream. If you have trouble completely emptying your mind, pick a word or phrase to focus on, “I am feeling peaceful,” “joy,” “quiet.” As you get more adept at finding the silence, lengthen out the time you spend in quiet. Notice how you feel as you allow yourself this gift everyday.

Jennifer Bloome is a Fertility Expert helping women energetically balance and heal their mind, body, and spirit to boost natural fertility. Jennifer is the creator of the internationally recognized Journey of the Heart series of guided meditations to support women in all stages of fertility treatment and pregnancy. For 3 no-charge guided meditations as well as information on teleclasses or individual sessions, please visit www.AnjiOnline.com.