Entries tagged with “emotions”.


Do you find yourself frustrated because a Mind~Body approach “doesn’t work”?

You’ve done it all. The relaxation. The affirmations. The visualizing. And you still don’t have your baby.

What’s the missing key?

Often, we make the decision that we’re the missing key — but in a negative way.

We are somehow broken, defective, or out of favor with the Divine (Spirit, God, Goddess). The Truth that we’ve cleverly hidden from the rest of the world is finally on view for all to see — we aren’t enough and the fact that there isn’t a baby is the final physical evidence.

All of these convoluted thoughts is one of the reasons infertility is so painful. Not only do you not have the child you want, but you use it as proof to beat yourself up.

The fact of the matter is, the key to allowing a Mind~Body~Spirit focus to bring you the baby you want is simpler than you think.

Consistency.

Each day we have somewhere in the neighborhood of 60,000 thoughts.

60,000 opportunities to take us to a Zen or stressful state of mind.
60,000 opportunities to put our bodies in a place of growth or fear.
60,000 opportunities to create a relax signal or a danger signal.

Depending on your choices, you are either placing your body in a state of alignment with fertility or with infertility.

Perfection is NOT required.

If you can take 51% of the opportunities to move toward peace, Zen, or growth, you are well on your way to creating an internal environment that is in alignment with fertility.

If you take 51% of the opportunities to surrender, let go, trust, open to receive, expect what you want, amplify your fertility, or play in the present moment (all pillars of Be-ing Fertile), you are well on your way to the consistency that will powerfully impact your fertility.

Is it simple? Perhaps.
Is it easy? No.

We have a life time of habits of thought that take us to feeling fear, worry, anxiety, and more.

So what do you do? Use all the Mind~Body~Spirit tools you possibly can:

Meditations
Yoga
Breathing Exercises
Guided Imagery
EFT (to release the patterns of thought that create fear, worry, anxiety)
Acupuncture

All of these will help you create a consistency of thought that will bring your Mind~Body~Spirit into harmony, build your Be-ing Fertile state of being, and align you with your baby.

Remember, I am asking you for consistency, not perfection. You do not need to be the master on the mountaintop to conceive.

I ask you to simply become aware of how you are directing your 60,000 thoughts each day and set the intention that 51% of them bring you towards Be-ing Fertile.

Jennifer Bloome is a Fertility Expert helping women energetically balance and heal their mind, body, and spirit to boost natural fertility. Jennifer is the creator of the internationally recognized Journey of the Heart series of guided meditations to support women in all stages of fertility treatment and pregnancy. For 3 no-charge guided meditations as well as information on teleclasses or individual sessions, please visit http://www.anjionline.com.

I have spoken with a number of clients this past week who have told me they feel like they are at their breaking point. Life, including fertility struggles, has pushed them to their edges and part of them is terrified they may shatter into too many pieces to ever be whole again.

When you are in this emotional space, the mind~body~spirit tenet “how you feel matters to your fertility” can feel like a slap in the face and simply one more reason to completely fall apart.

However, this emotional space can actually be the greatest gift to your fertility.

Why do I say this? When you are in this space, it is tempting to call yourself “broken.” I would argue you are “cracked open.” In this space, the thoughts and beliefs which support your most negative thought habits and patterns are right there, right at the surface.

These negative thought patterns and habits are typically buried deep within your psyche, creating internal stress and conflict and triggering the type of fight-or-flight response, which is so detrimental to your body. The reason it is so detrimental is because it is constantly running in the background — kind of like how having the dome light on inside your car overnight drains your car battery.

When you find yourself “cracked open,” here’s what you can do to find these beliefs.

Spend some time journaling. Write down exactly what you are feeling. Let yourself be your most whiney, honest, angry self. Let those words simply fly out onto the paper. Then, read back over what you’ve written. What are the themes?

Usually the themes boil down to: I’m not enough, I don’t deserve what I want, life isn’t fair, I’m not safe, etc.

Once you know your theme, now you can begin to build new thought patterns and habits to support the opposite. As the new patterns become habit, you support your body and your fertility from the inside out.

Jennifer Bloome is a Fertility Expert helping women energetically balance and heal their mind, body, and spirit to boost natural fertility. Jennifer is the creator of the internationally recognized Journey of the Heart series of guided meditations to support women in all stages of fertility treatment and pregnancy. For 3 no-charge guided meditations as well as information on teleclasses or individual sessions, please visit http://www.anjionline.com.

Blank SignsHow often are you certain that you KNOW what’s going to happen?

I am not talking about the ‘crystal ball’ type of seeing the future. What I am talking about are the times when you are certain you know what the outcome of a situation is going to be:

If my FSH turns out over 10, I KNOW I’ll never be able to get pregnant.
If I don’t get this project done and done well, I’m going to get fired.
If I don’t go to this event, my friends are never going to forgive me.

So, I’ve dramatized the situations a little bit to make a point. Yours may be a little more subtle:

If I don’t get to sleep, tomorrow is going to be a disaster.
If I don’t get the cat to the vet soon, the vet is going to think I’m a terrible caretaker.
If I don’t get these phone calls made before bed, everyone is going to be angry at me.

Are all of these really true?

95% of the time—NO.

So why do we do this to ourselves?

  • Habit.
  • We think it will motivate us.
  • Feels true in the moment.
  • Caught up in the moment.
  • It keeps us moving.

While all of these are legitimate reasons, they themselves aren’t always true. Predicting the future, no matter how small an issue, simply leads to increasing the stress response in your body. A little stress response is helpful—too much takes you over the edge. Too much decreases your productivity and gets you caught in the loop of things seeming worse and worse.

What if you could let go of making predictions about the results of your actions? What if you could simply do the activities or tasks without making a dire consequence?

How much more effective do you think you could be without the extra weight and pressure of predicting the future?

Jennifer Bloome is a Fertility Expert helping women energetically balance and heal their mind, body, and spirit to boost natural fertility. Jennifer is the creator of the internationally recognized Journey of the Heart series of guided meditations to support women in all stages of fertility treatment and pregnancy. For 3 no-charge guided meditations as well as information on teleclasses or individual sessions, please visit http://www.anjionline.com.

When you want something as powerfully as you want your family, your baby, you want an answer that is equally as powerful.

The tip I’m sharing with you today is powerful. This technique will create a ripple of healing throughout your body and reproductive system. But it’s going to seem too simple to have powerful effects. Before you read any further, make a commitment to do this technique for the next week.

The tip?

Several times throughout your day (I highly recommend setting your phone alarms), stop. Whatever you are doing, pause. Take 10 deep breaths.

Each time you do this, it is as if you are hitting the “reset” switch on your body. Every cell of your body completely releases and relaxes. When you do it consistently, your mind will clear, leaving you more open to make decisions you feel good about. You will create a deep sense of peace, which will allow you to engage the Spirit portion of the Mind~Body~Spirit continuum.

Using this technique naturally soothes your reproductive system and gives any ART you are doing a fertile ground from which to work.

I’d love to hear your results.

Jennifer Bloome is a Fertility Expert helping women energetically balance and heal their mind, body, and spirit to boost natural fertility. Jennifer is the creator of the internationally recognized Journey of the Heart series of guided meditations to support women in all stages of fertility treatment and pregnancy. For 3 no-charge guided meditations as well as information on teleclasses or individual sessions, please visit www.AnjiOnline.com.

In order for healthy conception to occur, your mind~body~spirit system must be open, communicating, and supportive of your intellectual desire to conceive. Each aspect of the system can place ‘stop signs’ to conception. Now, that’s anthropomorphizing in a big way… and yet, our mind~body~spirit system is a very alive system that has many moving parts, all working together to bring your heart’s/soul’s desire to physical existence.

What gets in the way of this happening? Why WOULDN’T your system work towards creating your heart’s desire?

The simple answer to this question is: safety.

Your mind~body~spirit’s main job is to keep you safe and alive. It’s in easy to think of some forms of safety: keeping you from stepping out in front of a bus, or deciding not to slip into bath water that makes your foot reflexes recoil from water so hot you would burn your skin. But what if safety came from your belief that you can’t share your true thoughts? Or that it was more important that someone else be happy than you? Or if something comes easily to you, you don’t deserve it?

Where do these beliefs come from?

Life experience. And not necessarily even your OWN life experience.

Most of our beliefs are in place by the age of seven. Some people even say three. So as an adult, you’re making decisions and beliefs from a child’s point of view.

What’s more: the part of brain responsible for recording emotions begins developing from the second day of conception. Can you have emotions this early? Your Mother did. From very, very early on in your Mother’s pregnancy with you, you were picking up on her emotional experiences and her vibrations.

If there was some stress and then some relief and then some stress and some relief then you learned that when stress happens, peace isn’t far behind. But, if there was a lot of fear and worry and no relief — your very basic systems learned the world isn’t a place to be trusted.

By the age of three you already developed the “lens” you look at life through.

Add to that the other beliefs you may have learned as you are growing up: keep quiet. Children are a hassle. You can’t have what you want. These beliefs weren’t yours to start with; they simply came with your experience.

You might begin to think that you are doomed. Or I’m telling you to place blame squarely on someone else’s shoulders. Not at all.

The idea is to begin to take a look at your own beliefs about the world. Are they really true? What do you really want to believe? How could NOT getting pregnant seem like a safer solution to your body than GETTING pregnant?

That last question’s a doozy. At least it can be when you haven’t thought about conceiving from a mind~body~spirit perspective. The first step is to find the beliefs. The next step is to begin to build new beliefs and remove those stop signs your body thinks are keeping you safe.

You hold the power to change the “lens” through which you see the world. The “lens” that creates the beliefs that can create the stop signs to conception. How wonderful will it be to clean house of the beliefs that are creating things in your life that weren’t even yours to begin with!

Jennifer Bloome is a Fertility Expert helping women energetically balance and heal their mind, body, and spirit to boost natural fertility. Jennifer is the creator of the internationally recognized Journey of the Heart series of guided meditations to support women in all stages of fertility treatment and pregnancy. For 3 no-charge guided meditations as well as information on teleclasses or individual sessions, please visit www.AnjiOnline.com.

One of the advantages of using a Mind~Body approach to healing your fertility is that this approach is very personal to you. You are connecting and listening to what your body is telling you, you are paying attention to the emotions and feelings that are present for you, you are “feeding” your body with images of what you want.

However, this can lead to a sneaky new belief: I am the one who has to create this baby. I have to make sure I’m doing all the right things for my body. I have to make sure to visualize at the right time. I have to pay attention to everything. I have to… (fill in the blank).

I say this belief is sneaky because discovering the power you have in relationship to your body is SO important. However, when you want something as much as a child, you want to do everything you can, and it becomes easy to cross the line. Meaning, you end up trying to control your body and its processes instead of listening and working with them.

All this does is create more stress in your Mind~Body~Spirit system.

Your job is to listen to your body. To allow your emotions to flow. To shift your thoughts and feelings. To follow the inspired actions that arise as you listen. To be open and allow your body to do her work.

When you are in this place of allowing, you open to your deep wisdom, your connection with Spirit, the mystery portion of conceiving. This is where conception happens.

Your job is to “till the soil.” Spirit’s job is to “plant the seed.”

So tune into the powerful Mind~Body connection with whatever tools resonate with you. Feel your body coming into alignment with your deep connection to Spirit. Whenever you sense yourself tiptoeing over the line into wanting to control Spirit’s job, come back to your tools. Come back into allowing.

Now you have truly found the power of a Mind~Body approach.

Jennifer Bloome is a Fertility Expert helping women energetically balance and heal their mind, body, and spirit to boost natural fertility. Jennifer is the creator of the internationally recognized Journey of the Heart series of guided meditations to support women in all stages of fertility treatment and pregnancy. For 3 no-charge guided meditations as well as information on teleclasses or individual sessions, please visit www.AnjiOnline.com.

I recently received a beautiful e-mail from a client who used the Anji meditations to help with conceiving and a healthy pregnancy. During our e-mail conversation, she shared this comment with me:

“It’s amazing what happened when I started to believe in myself again and trust my body, and relax. I used to get upset when my OB told me to ‘relax, it will happen,’ relaxing really was what I needed. ”

If only the OBs were able to explain this in a deep and complete enough way, so many more people could be helped with that information! However, without an understanding of why it’s so important to incorporate relaxation, the comment “just relax” comes off sounding like a dismissal of your experience, or how you are feeling inside is unimportant or easy to change.

Mind~Body medicine is able to both explain the impact of how you feel on your fertility and give you the tools to shift. In other words, how you are feeling is directly related to your fertility, and therefore, vitally important to consider. (It isn’t just how you are feeling BECAUSE of your fertility challenges, but how your emotions and beliefs impacted your fertility BEFORE you wanted to conceive).

Let me give you a more in depth explanation from the point of view of one form of mind~body medicine, Chinese Medicine.

From a Chinese Medicine perspective, we are all born with a life essence, which is stored and expressed as Kidney energy. The activity we do during our daily lives either adds to that bank of energy, or removes it.

The goal is to have many more activities that add to the bank. When we constantly remove — through stress, anxiety, fear, busyness, etc. — we end up dipping into our basic life essence, which is hard on the body and the basic life processes we need to work — including reproduction.

How you feel is a perfect indicator of whether you are adding or subtracting from this life essence.

When your life is full of emotion that doesn’t feel good like perfectionism, fear, worry, shame, guilt, stress, hopelessness, and anger, you are not adding to the bank of life essence, you are withdrawing from it. People come into this life with all different amounts in their banks. However, with enough ongoing drains, no matter what you came in with, you will start draining that basic amount.

When your life and feelings tend more towards neutrality, hope, calm, peace, happiness, you are adding to your life essence.

What is even more interesting about all of this is that in Chinese Medicine, Kidney is responsible for reproduction. This gives you a direct correlation between how you feel and your ability to conceive.

For the next week, I ask you to slip into the role of observer: are you adding or subtracting from your life essence?

Jennifer Bloome is a Fertility Expert helping women energetically balance and heal their mind, body, and spirit to boost natural fertility. Jennifer is the creator of the internationally recognized Journey of the Heart series of guided meditations to support women in all stages of fertility treatment and pregnancy. For 3 no-charge guided meditations as well as information on teleclasses or individual sessions, please visit www.AnjiOnline.com.

I think that letting go is something that happens in waves, or in maybe layers is a better word. We have so many hopes, dreams, and emotions wrapped up in each part of us that we want to release, it almost has to happen in stages. Give yourself permission to let go of whatever piece you can today and know that tomorrow a little bit more will go and the next day a bit more…

Imagery for letting go in stages:

Imagine your mind and body is wrapped around whatever you wish to release as tightly as a new bud on a rose bush. This bud is completely wrapped with the green outer petals still tightly furled. It is so tightly furled that the true shape of the bud is still distorted. What would happen if those first leaves never released? What if the flower yet to be just stayed tightly curled around its core? How much energy is it taking just to be trying to hold so tightly to this position? Imagine your mind and body is slowly deciding to loosen, just a bit. Perhaps, even loosening seems scary, so they decide just not to hold on so hard, so the first decision is to release the muscles that are working so hard to hang on. Then, when you are ready, imagine that your mind and body are slowing unfurling from this issue, gently opening and releasing, and opening and releasing, slowly showing more and more of what’s inside, exposing the color, shape, and beauty of the flower within. Gently, and at your own pace, opening to new possibilities.

Jennifer Bloome is a Fertility Expert helping women energetically balance and heal their mind, body, and spirit to boost natural fertility. Jennifer is the creator of the internationally recognized Journey of the Heart series of guided meditations to support women in all stages of fertility treatment and pregnancy. For 3 no-charge guided meditations as well as information on teleclasses or individual sessions, please visit www.AnjiOnline.com.

We all want it at one time or another. THE answer. THE technique. THE “thing” to DO that will give you what you want. THE “thing” you can just DO—preferably, once —that will ease the pain once and for all that will immediately provide the results.

How many times, as you have tried to conceive your family, have you closed your eyes and wished or prayed for “the answer.” “Just TELL me what to do and I’ll DO it. I just need to know what to DO.”

In reality, though, this is a trap. Actually, it’s two traps.

Trap #1: If it isn’t big, it isn’t enough.

This is a trap because it keeps you from seeing the small changes you could make that together add up to the big result. You keep waiting for the big “thing” to do and ignore the other small messages your body is giving you.

Why do we keep doing this to ourselves?

Small seems too easy. Small seems insignificant. Small feels like you aren’t really trying. If there was something small that could really affect your fertility, everyone would be doing it by now.

This leads directly into trap #2.

Trap #2: DOING something external is more important than BEING something internally.

Our culture puts a lot of emphasis on physical action. Emotions and feelings are something that are “nice” to change, but not really important.

In your body, you can’t get further from the truth.

Your cells are always listening to your emotions and your feelings. Your emotions create the cellular environment that determines what aspect of your DNA is switched on or off. This same environment causes your cells to be either in growth mode or in protection/fear mode.

Your emotions and your feelings are a vital part of your fertility. They are a vital part of aging. They are a vital part of every aspect of your health.

“THE” Answer

Pay attention to the thoughts, emotions, and feelings that are swirling in your body. What can you DO today that will help shift those thoughts, emotions, and feelings that help you move from sadness, fear, anxiety, to a more neutral or positive state of mind?

What small shift in thinking will help with this? You don’t need to shift from feeling deep sadness or worry immediately to being a “Pollyanna” about your fertility. However, what is something small that you can change in your thoughts that will bring a sense of relief?

As you experience a small sense of relief here, and then another small sense of relief, and then yet another, you’ll begin to find it gets easier and easier. You’ll find you no longer have to work at it, the shifting will happen on it’s own. How different would day-to-day life be? How different would your cells be acting throughout your body? What impact could you make on your fertility?

You’ll notice I did use the word DO. Physical action is an important part—you won’t get pregnant simply by sitting and feeling good. However, as you make your small shifts in thought, you’ll be more drawn to the types of physical changes that will help you discover the best path to your family.

Jennifer Bloome is a Fertility Expert helping women energetically balance and heal their mind, body, and spirit to boost natural fertility. Jennifer is the creator of the internationally recognized Journey of the Heart series of guided meditations to support women in all stages of fertility treatment and pregnancy. For 3 no-charge guided meditations as well as information on teleclasses or individual sessions, please visit www.AnjiOnline.com.

When you aren’t receiving something that you’ve been working so hard to achieve, one of the aspects that can be “off” in your psyche is the concept of what it means to “want.”

Is it okay to “want”?

Do we all really deserve what we want?

Is it fair to say that everyone who “wants” a baby should receive one?

Many spiritual traditions and let’s face it, many parents and society in general, instill in us the message: it’s not okay to want. It’s selfish to want. You don’t always get what you want. Don’t get your hopes up.

But is it really true?

In my Spiritual journey, I’ve learned something completely to the opposite: wanting is what helps your soul evolve. As you develop new wants and allow yourself to align with them, you are developing and growing not just yourself, but the world as a whole.

These types of wants range from material to the esoteric.

Wants are driving your growth and what you are receiving. You’re literally wired to want.

“But, Jennifer,” you say, “I’ve wanted a baby for a long time now, why aren’t I receiving what I want?”

Sometimes it takes a while for wants to manifest in physical form. As humans, we like to give meaning, so we create beliefs about the fact that the baby isn’t present yet: “I must not deserve this.” Or, “I’m not good enough to deserve this.” Or, any other combination or permutation of those messages.

Here’s what I want you to realize: when you make a decision like that, you are literally working against your Self and your Soul. When you carry these beliefs deep within your system, the Universe is going to bring more experiences that match this belief.

You are setting up beliefs that make it even harder to get what you want. This, of course, tends to seem to prove the belief.

The place to start is knowing: “I deserve what I want. I choose to receive what I want.”

What other beliefs about wanting are you now ready to release?

Jennifer Bloome is a Fertility Expert helping women energetically balance and heal their mind, body, and spirit to boost natural fertility. Jennifer is the creator of the internationally recognized Journey of the Heart series of guided meditations to support women in all stages of fertility treatment and pregnancy. For 3 no-charge guided meditations as well as information on teleclasses or individual sessions, please visit www.AnjiOnline.com.